How to Set S.M.A.R.T. Goals for Couples

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How to Set S.M.A.R.T. Goals for Couples

The term S.M.A.R.T. Goals aren’t just for business. The principles applied to help business owners become successful in their ventures can be applied in marriage, and in a biblical way. If you’ve never set goals for your marriage, now is the time to get with your spouse and consider creating a few.

How to Set S.M.A.R.T. Goals for Couples

Benefits of Setting Goals for Couples

When a couple decides to set marriage goals, it instantly gives you something to work toward – set goals for your marriage. Mike and I will be the first to tell you that this will do wonders in your relationship. While pursuing your goals you’ll find yourself intentionally spending more time together, having more meaningful conversations, and sharing more intimate moments.

To establish S.M.A.R.T. goals for your marriage, let’s look at them through practical application along with a Scriptural focus.

How to Set S.M.A.R.T. Goals for Couples

As you may have guessed, the word S.M.A.R.T. is an acronym for five aspects that come together to create goals that are actionable and realistic, with the overall goal being… you guessed it again, SMART!

S – Specific

Being as specific as possible with goals is the first step to actually seeing the results from setting them. If you set a goal of being more intimate with your spouse, what does that really look like? Instead of the general “more intimacy” goal, think of ways that would actually help you establish that. Perhaps smaller goals such as:

  • Weekly date nights.
  • Completing a one-month couple’s bible study.
  • Cooking X amount of meals together each week.

Scripture focus: May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed. (Psalm 20:4)

M – Measurable

Along with making goals specific, they need to be measurable. You and your spouse should be able to look at what you’ve established along with what you’ve done to reach the goal. For example, what could be done to make sure the weekly date nights happen and are you actually doing it? The answers to questions like that will help you see where adjustments can be made.

Scripture focus: But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded. (2 Chronicles 15:7)

S.M.A.R.T. Goals for Couples

A – Attainable

This is a goal in and of itself. The cumulation of specific and measurable goals is ultimately achieving them. In essence, as you’re creating your marriage goals, make sure they are achievable in some way, shape, or form. Even if you have to start small, at least it’s a place to start.

Scripture focus: Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37:4)

R – Relevant

This is where setting S.M.A.R.T. goals can get tricky. There are many facets to marriage, some of which can include children, work, and homeschooling. This makes it all the more important to set goals relevant to your marriage. There is certainly nothing wrong with including goals for other aspects of your family life, but make sure your goals are marriage and relationship-specific between you and your spouse. As you reach these goals, you’ll most likely see and feel the ripple effects of a thriving marriage in other areas. 

Scripture focus: Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans. (Proverbs 16:3)

T – Time-Bound

Continuing with some of the examples from before, we see that the goals were given a specific time such as weekly, one month, and week. Giving your goals a specific timeframe will create a focus on reaching them. Consider getting a goal-setting planner and coming up with set time frames for your goals. Remember to be specific!

Scripture focus: The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty. (Proverbs 21:5)

As you and your spouse create S.M.A.R.T. goals, keep these practical tips in mind. Don’t forget to celebrate and reward yourself once you’ve reached the goals set. Then, rinse and repeat.

More to Consider

Come see the top 5 reasons you should be setting goals in your marriage.

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