Homeschooling Through Depression
I haven’t seen many posts about homeschooling through depression. It’s not something we like to think about or talk about. I guess most of us don’t like to admit when we’re depressed, and it’s not exactly a cheerful topic to discuss or read about. I know from experience, though, that many of us have suffered from depression, and life doesn’t stop for us just because we’re having a difficult time.
I’ve had problems with depression off and on for years. It’s something that, unfortunately, runs in my family. I honestly believe it has to do with a chemical imbalance. Whatever the cause, though, the reality is that I’ve homeschooled for the past 15 years, and I’ve had to homeschool through times of depression more than once. I’m thankful to say that, with medication and the help of a wonderful doctor, I’ve been depression-free for several years now. I hope to stay that way! But for those who are dealing with depression and are trying to homeschool, I’d like to tell you how I coped. It wasn’t easy, but I’m glad to share what I can with you to help you carry on.
First of all, I learned that, when I was depressed, I needed to make sure (if possible) to get enough sleep, but not too much sleep. When we are depressed, we tend to want to sleep more than we should. We feel like we need a lot more sleep. Maybe we do need some extra sleep, but it’s not good to sleep a lot more than usual. That can make the depression worse. It can also cause you to fall so far behind on housework and/or school work that you feel even worse. Try to stick as closely as possible to your normal bedtime and your normal time for getting up in the morning. Sleeping more than that may actually add to your feelings of depression.
Second, don’t isolate yourself. When I was depressed, I didn’t feel like talking to anyone or going anywhere. I had to force myself to leave the house to take my children to the park or to go to church or even the grocery store. Thankfully, my children liked to attend our homeschool group’s play days at the park, and they urged me to take them. That forced me to get out of the house at least once each week. My husband made sure we went to church, so that was another outing each week. I also tried to make myself pick up the phone and call my sister or a friend who understood what I was going through on the days I just didn’t feel like I could cope. It always made me feel better to talk to someone for a few minutes.
Third, don’t be too hard on yourself! Try to do the minimum amount of housework and even school work. It will be much better to set a reachable goal than to try to keep up with a regular schedule that you simply can’t maintain at the time. Do just what has to be done, and don’t push yourself to do more. If your children are old enough, allow them to help out a little bit more than usual until you feel better.
Fourth, do something you enjoy every day. Even if you don’t feel like doing it, take a walk outside if it’s a nice day. Listen to some music. Read an uplifting book. Get together with a friend. Watch a happy movie. I remember that being outside was one of the things that helped me the most during the time I was so depressed. I even started taking my youngest child’s school work outside to do with her because it made me feel so much better just to be out of the house. I also did a lot of reading aloud to my children during that time. That way we were doing something useful during our school time even if we weren’t doing all of our regular classes.
Finally, you may want to consider seeing a doctor. I don’t necessarily believe that all depression needs to be treated with medication, but it is something to consider if you have recurring depression or if you feel hopeless. And if you are a Christian, prayer is very important and helpful. There were many days during the time I was depressed that I didn’t feel like praying or doing anything else, but I had friends and relatives pray for me when I couldn’t do it myself.
Even if it seems like you won’t make it, you will! It’s a terrible thing to suffer from depression, but you can make it, and you can continue homeschooling through it. It’s definitely not easy, but it is possible. I hope this post encourages you. And I pray that you will quickly feel better. May God bless you and keep you during your difficult time.
Homeschooling Through Difficult Times Series
Wendy lives in the South with her wonderful hubby and 3 great kiddos! She is a Christian, homeschooling, work-from-home mom. She and Scott were high school sweethearts and have been married for more than 20 years. Her oldest child has autism, and Wendy began homeschooling her at age 2. Her son, a typical boy, would rather do anything than school! Her youngest child is a little social butterfly and people lover. Wendy loves reading and quilting and will hopefully return to scrapbooking sometime soon. She blogs at Homeschooling Blessings and at Hip Homeschool Moms where she is co-owner and social media director.
Wendy, thank you so much for your transparency, honesty, and kindness is addressing this issue. Just that – thank you.
Sorry! Seeing this now; was this written by Carlie? Well, to whomever:) Thank you!
Melanie, it was written by Wendy, you had it right 🙂 So happy this post was able to encourage you! Be sure to check back for the next several days as we’ll be adding many more topics. Bless you!
Thank you for this post. Our family lost our home to foreclosure and have had to move 4 times in the last 3 years! It has been an insane journey and in many ways I wouldn’t trade it for the strength it has given to my relationship with God. But it has also been the most horrible 3 years of my life too! We tend to grow during adversity, but it isn’t easy either!! With our family uprooted, dealing with slum lords and bad situations that kept getting worse, I really struggled with depression a LOT. We didn’t have anyone we could really talk to and be honest with because of the ‘masks’ that everyone wears when they are at church. But we are finally coming out the other side so to speak. To say that HS’ing has been a challenge would win the understatement of the year award! I do not know how we have done it. Our school year is all switched around because we lost a month extra due to packing and unpacking every year. We have had to switch to schooling pretty much year round because of the time it takes to move. It is nice to know that at least one other mom out there struggled with depression. We HS’ers always have to kinda put the face out that we are ‘more than conquerors’ and always feel the pressure to seem as though ‘we got this’! But in reality we are human. We have chosen to harder road out of love for our children, but it doesn’t mean we are superheros. Thanks for your honesty.
Wonderful post. I am a homeschool mom who has known depression (and also work as a counselor with people who are depressed). Your advice is spot on. Along with your suggestion of doing something you enjoy each day, if you laugh each day, your body will make some healing chemicals. (Here’s a post on that, if you’re interested: http://7sistershomeschool.com/2012/11/06/but-seriously-folks-the-power-of-laughter-in-your-homeschool/)
I also suggest gentle exercise, healthy eating, and full-spectrum light bulbs (in the winter).
Thanks for the lovely post!
Thank you so much for your post and your honesty. My daughter and I have recently gone through multiple traumas that have impacted us both very deeply. I’m dealing with a lot of fall out from it now; depression included. I have a traumatic brain injury, so it makes it a bit more complicated, but your post comforted me, and made me feel less guilty for feeling depressed. Blessings to you.
~Kimberly
Lovely, well spoken and genuine, thanks Wendy for your encouragement!
I have suffered with anxiety and depression a number of years and have homeschooled for almost 18 years. It is hard, and the above ideas are great. I recently wrote a post about combating homeschool burnout. Although not specific to depression, the ideas help those homeschoolers who are depressed and burned out.