Good communication is so very important! Let me illustrate by telling you a funny story about something that happened to my hubby and me years ago.
We were headed to Tennessee for a camping trip, and we were chatting as we drove along. I happened to see a deer dart into the woods as we drove past, so I asked Scott if he saw it. He had missed it, so without really thinking about it, I started watching for another deer to show to him as we drove along and talked.
After driving along for a while, Scott pointed and asked, “Hey, do you see that deer?” I said, “No, I missed that one.” As we continued to drive, he pointed out several more deer, but I didn’t see any of them.
Finally, in frustration, he said, “How can you not see them? Can’t you smell them when we get close?”
After he said that, I thought he was crazy! Did he actually think he could smell the deer that were running away as we were passing by?! I wasn’t sure how to react to that! I must have looked shocked or something because he paused for just a minute and then said, “Um…I’m talking about all the deer on the side of the road. The ones that got hit by cars. Roadkill.”
I laughed so hard I nearly cried! There he was thinking I had lost my mind (or my vision) because I was missing all of those deer that we were passing, and I couldn’t even smell them and be alerted to their presence. There I was thinking he had lost his mind because he actually thought we could smell those deer as they darted into the woods! It took me a while to calm down enough to tell him what was so funny. Once I was able to communicate to him why I was laughing so hysterically, he joined me.
Thankfully, this instance of bad communication turned out to be funny. Sometimes, though, they don’t turn out that well! Sometimes, instances of miscommunication (or total lack of communication) cause hurt feelings or anger.
There are many things to consider when it comes to communicating well with your spouse, but the one I’d like to stress now is simple. Before you get upset, angry, or hurt, calmly clarify what your spouse meant first. Perhaps your understanding of what he just said to you is totally different than what he actually meant to say! Give him the benefit of the doubt, keep your cool, and simply ask him to explain what he meant. You might be surprised at how many misunderstanding that this one little tip can prevent!
This also works with your children, friends, co-workers, etc. Try it out and see what happens! And don’t forget to leave a comment telling your own funny miscommunication story or success story! We’d love to hear from you!
Wendy lives in the South with her wonderful hubby and 3 great kiddos! She is a Christian, homeschooling, work-from-home mom. She and Scott were high school sweethearts and have been married for more than 20 years. Her oldest child has autism, and Wendy began homeschooling her at age 2. Her son, a typical boy, would rather do anything than school! Her youngest child is a little social butterfly and people lover. Wendy loves reading and quilting and will hopefully return to scrapbooking sometime soon. She blogs at Homeschooling Blessings and at Hip Homeschool Moms where she is co-owner and social media director.
Photo at top of post is from http://www.freedigitalphotos.net.