Seeking Adventure with Your Spouse

My marriage is my favorite relationship here on earth. This is the man I’ve said “I do” to and plan to be with when we are an old-aged, gray-haired,  front porch-sittin’,  great-grandkids-watchin’ , story-tellin’,  sweet old couple.

But to be able to do that, we must live a life together so that we can have stories to tell.

It doesn’t matter if you have opposite interests; there is still room to seek adventures together. Even if your schedules are swamped, you don’t have enough time to NOT seek adventures together.

Adventures tie your heart strings together.

Doing things together builds companionship.

Exploring life together makes memories.

Memories make stories.

Stories leave family legacies.

You know when you get a bunch of old high school buddies together after 30, 40, or 50 years,  and all they have to talk about is old high school throwback stories? I don’t wan’t my marriage to be like that.

I want to have new stories to tell with each season of life.

These memory-making companionship activities don’t have to be expensive or elaborate. They just have to be together.

It breaks my heart when I hear people say, “I just don’t LOVE him/her anymore.” “We’ve grown apart.” “We have nothing in common.”

All of those issues could have been  fixed and prevented with intentionality.

Love is a choice. It takes effort. It takes sacrifice.

It is easy to grow apart when you aren’t putting effort into growing together, which is why it is so important to us in our marriage to be intentional about seeking adventures together. I do things that I don’t like to do — but he likes to do. He does things he doesn’t like to do — but I like to do. We do things together for fun, laughter, and life experiences.

We are in the season of  life and marriage of little children. They take a lot of time, mental effort, and energy. It is time and energy that we want to give to them and love giving to them. But we also know that someday they will grow up and leave our house and we will be left with each other.

We want to still like each other when that happens. We want to still know each other when that happens. We want to enjoy our “live-in” best friend and really make the relationship an enjoyable one.

We both know that will only happen if we continue to invest in each other no matter what season of life we are in.

3 Tips on Seeking Adventure with Your Spouse

1. Go Places

Plan and save for at least 3 outings a year. (This does not count dates — but that’s a whole other article.)  They don’t have to be overnight — just something that is out of regular routine. Make a memory!  Suggestions:

• Comedy shows (Tim Hawkins is HILARIOUS! Laughter is always good for relationships!)
• 1 weekend getaway per year. (You can do this for very little money!) We personally love hiking and outdoors type weekends.
• Sporting events
• Live shows/plays
• or anything you want, just be creative!

2. Do Things

Do FREE things together just for fun! Here are some tips that we’ve come up with:

• Hiking trails or walks
• Racquetball, frisbee, catch
• Build a project
• Do a home improvement project (together is the key!). We’ve had some of our most memorable adventures doing this. (Good and bad! lol)
• Board games
• Plan family fun days together that include the kids or friends. (Work together on the planning and implementing — that’s the key!)

3. Get Out of Routine

Have something to talk about, remember, and reflect on when you get to be that old-aged, gray-haired,  front porch-sittin’ ,  great-grandkids-watchin’, story-tellin’ ,  sweet old couple.

Please hear me when I say — the tying of hearts isn’t in what you do but who you do it with.

Don’t think that you have to afford great vacations, elaborate trips, and exotic excursions to seek adventures with your spouse. You just simply have to LIVE LIFE TOGETHER, not apart.

Life itself is an adventure and a gift.

Enjoy life and live life with the one you married, even in the day-to-day moments. They matter.

Talk to each other.

Laugh with each other.

Smile at each other.

Be together.

What will be your next adventure?

Amanda Farris is a wife to her super hero hunk of a husband and a mother to 3 little kiddos. She is a teacher/coach who hung up her coaching whistle after she got promoted to motherhood. She is a runner who loves all things sports and outdoors. Amanda loves early morning traveling, long coffee chats with her husband, and fresh flowers on her table. She appreciates good puns and analogies and has a great talent of unintentionally becoming over-busy (that’s a bad thing). So she is constantly reevaluating her life priorities which keeps her on her toes and helps her to live life passionately and deliberately. You can find her occasionally blogging at www.amandafarris.org